navel gazing | Theo Kane

March 8, 2010

Q&A: Relationships with Books

1. Which book has been on your shelves the longest?

Probably the children’s book about the adventures of a tooth fairy and me. Remember those stands in the malls in the ’80s where they’d put your child’s name in the book and print it right there for you. (Wow, 80s technology, that must’ve been annoying at the time.) Anyway, it’s a thin little memento from my childhood.

The oldest book I own is a copy of Uncle Tom’s Cabin, which was given to me by my great-grandma. I never read it. And keep it more as a family heirloom than anything else.

2. What is your last read, your current read, and the book you’ll read next?

The last book I read was Charlene Harris’ Club Dead, the 3rd book in the Sookie Stackhouse series. Currently, I have a stack of comics to read and am part way through Tara Hunt’s The Whuffie Factor, which I’m reading slowly and taking job-related notes on. I’m not really sure what book I’ll be picking up next. I have an entire shelf full of “to-read” books. Continue reading “Q&A: Relationships with Books”

February 8, 2010January 1, 2018

Things of a Kind

Dandolin Wishes by Olivander — Dandelion Wishes

10 things I wish I could say to 10 different people I know (no names used):

I miss when you had dreams for the future.
I feel like I’m always polishing what you carved. The splinters are annoying.
I had this dream once that you were suicidal and only had one reason to live. My subconscious is pretty right about this.
I miss the stories you used to tell, but then you dropped off the face of the earth. For a long time, I was worried you died, but I’m glad you resurfaced even if we don’t know each other anymore.
I’ve know for a long time that you’re gay, but have never pushed it as we aren’t that close. But when you do finally come out, I just want you to know I’ll support you.
I wish I could hold your hand and show you what I see about you. But you’d probably just laugh as it’s something to discover on your own.
I thought you were really rude to me and dishonest about what you were expecting, mostly to cover your butt.
I love you. A lot. I always have and always will. But never in the way you want.
I think you should dump him and move on with your life. You deserve someone who will take care of you too.
I really want to be your friend and part of your community, but for some reason, always have a hard time connecting with you.

Continue reading “Things of a Kind”

January 24, 2010

Happy Birthday, Matt

Happy Birthday Dog by BarrieBarrie Today is my friend Matt’s birthday. Matt’s a dear friend who lives too far away and who’s easily embarrassed, which makes this all the more fun.

Happy 26th Birthday, Matt.

I met Matt my freshman year of college when we lived in the dorms together and happened to be taking a different section of the same Java 101 class. While I became a creative writing major rather than a programmer, Matt stuck with it and works as a video game designer. Unfortunately, Matt moved to California for work and I stayed in Seattle after college. Thus, why I am not dragging a birthday cake over to his apartment.

Matt is one of those friends that you want to move next door to you or live in the same building as you. He’s one of those friends who’s there when you need him. I know in some of my most trying times, Matt’s been the one I’ve sought his wisdom and comfort. And I hope that I’ve been a good friend to him when he’s needed it.

During our sophomore year, we really bonded when Matt’s house became my home away from home to escape. His room became the makeshift library, an often freezing library. His housemates in poor college student tradition decided they didn’t need to pay for heating. We’d often crawl under the comforter on Matt’s bed with our coats on to keep from freezing while exercising our brains. I frequently raided Matt’s sock drawer and sweatshirt drawer for extra layers. Usually ending up with something proclaiming his love for the Dodgers.

One of my favorite Matt stories is a time he came over to do laundry. The dryer in his place had broke. He managed to spill dry laundry soap flakes all over my living room, but I hustled him down to the basement to put in his laundry before someone else in the building got to the washer. By the time Matt came back, I’d already vacuumed. He felt awful and asked if there was anything else he could do. Sure, he could wrap the cord around the vacuum and put it away. I watched in fascination as Matt proceeded to wind the cord around the vacuum like a kite string. Then I asked him why he didn’t use the cord’s hooks. Turns out, at 20-years-old, Matt had never vacuumed. Continue reading “Happy Birthday, Matt”

December 31, 2009

Top 20 Movies of the Decade

Inspired by my friend Kyle’s list and everyone else’s, these are my Top 20 Movies of the Decade. Every movie on this list was made between 2000-2009. Looking at my list, I definitely stopped watching new movies during my college years and pre-having a car. You won’t find any horror movies on the list as I’m easily scared. I like road-trips (6 movies), superheros/epic fantasy (8 movies), strong women leading/co-leading roles (15 movies), and LGBT characters (7 movies).

Continue reading “Top 20 Movies of the Decade”

December 2, 2009

The Story of My Left Boob

Or Why I Support a Public Option Health Care Plan for All

Boobs. As a woman with family history of breast cancer, I can tell you that boobs aren’t something we’re shy about talking about; breasts are important. They are battleground. A ticking time bomb. A much discussed enhancement of beauty and youth. A food source for human babies. There are Congressional bills about them. Despite the new guidelines, we all believe in self-examinations and starting mammograms at age 40. My beloved maternal grandma was diagnosed with breast cancer seven years ago. She’s a survivor. Those ubiquitous pink ribbons dot a lot of my mother’s accessories.

I went in a few weeks ago to my doctor’s for a routine physical. As my doctor’s asking me about my eating habits and checking my breasts, she finds an odd lump on my left breast. Lump + family history = ultrasound at a diagnostics lab. (I’m too young for a mammogram.) I freak out a little. My doctor says it’s probably nothing, just something I should get checked. I freak some more. I tell myself my mom’s had several benign lumps removed. Comfort comes in statistics and phone calls to friends. And then I freak out a little more.

At some point, I realize I’m not freaking out because I might have cancer and die, but I’m freaking out about my health insurance (or inn-sewer-ants, as Terry Prachett put it). Continue reading “The Story of My Left Boob”

May 30, 2009

5 Reasons to Follow Me (emcgillivray) on Twitter

Post inspired by Corvida over on SheGeeks.net.

Here are 5 Reasons to follow me (emcgillivray) over on Twitter and why Twitter is part of my relevant conversations.

1. You get an instant version of me, and I tend to share more of my interests in quick bursts than sitting down to write a blog post. You’ll see more of what you see here and at my other blogs, but Twitter is far more easy to share through.

2. I share out links that I find interesting and I think that you might too. Knowledge is power, after all. Even if that knowledge is chatter about the new Star Trek movie.

3. Many of my links come from friends, especially my Tweeple. I help my friends get heard beyond just their social circle.

4. I engage my tweeple and, in turn, we have conversations.

5. I recently got a G1 Android phone and started sharing photos from it on Twitter to help illustrate my life.

I’d love if you joined me over on Twitter or started following me if you’re over there already. Let the sharing began.

May 9, 2009

11 Book Meme Questions

I’m a big reader from way back. Yes, I vote for libraries and I have a fondness for Reading Rainbow and LeVar Burton. English major as charged.

01. Do you snack while you read? If so, favorite reading snack?

Occasionally, I’ll have some popcorn. Mostly, however, I drink water while reading. If one could have a water addiction, I’ve got it.

02. Do you tend to mark your books as you read, or does the idea of writing in books horrify you?

I don’t mark the books I read, except my Bible, which has notes all over from my years in Lutheran middle school. Marking books doesn’t horrify me, so much as annoy me. The only time I’ve been horrified by my own marks in books was those I made when I was younger and I’m just being horrified at my young self.

03. How do you keep your place while reading a book? Bookmark? Dog-ears? Laying the book flat open?

Mostly, I use bookmarks. Some of my bookmarks I’ve had since I was kid. My favorite is one with stars on it that I got at OMSI when I was a kid. It’s shiny.

04. Fiction, Non-fiction, or both?

I read both. Mostly, fiction, but I’ve been known to enjoy nonfiction as well.

05. Hardcopy or audiobooks?

I’m a sucker for the hardcopy. Which is why I’m not sure if I would ever get a Kindle to read books from. My middle name might as well be “needs another bookcase.” I do listen to audiobooks on my iPod when I’m working as I can’t exactly sit there and read. I find that the audiobooks need to be funny to keep me entertained. Currently, I’m listening to Terry Prachett’s Discworld novels. Yes, all of them.

06. Are you a person who tends to read to the end of chapters, or are you able to put a book down at any point?

I prefer to read until the end of the chapter, but if for whatever reason I need to put the book down, I can at any point.

07. If you come across an unfamiliar word, do you stop to look it up right away? Write it down to look it up later? Just try to infer what it means from the rest of the sentence, and keep going?

I try to infer. If it’s something that really bugs me or I have my computer open for a quick dictionary.com search, I’ll look it up.

08. What are you currently reading?

Tara Hunt’s The Whuffie Factor: Using the Power of Social Networks to Build Your Business, various weekly comics, Philip Pullman’s The Amber Spyglass, and Terry Pratchett’s Reaper Man.

09. What is the last book you bought?

Tara Hunt’s The Whuffie Factor: Using the Power of Social Networks to Build Your Business and my weekly comic pull.

10. Are you the type of person that only reads one book at a time or can read more than one at a time?

I would say one at a time, but my reading list suggests otherwise. I would say that I read one at a time with different purposes. I read one comic at a time. I listen to one audiobook (Pratchett) at a time. I read one book (Hunt) at a time. And I have Jason read one book (Pullman) to me at a time.

11. Do you like re-reading books?

I rarely re-read books. There have been a few; mostly, they were ones I read when I was a tween (not all of them YA books either) and I remembered really enjoying them, but I’d forgotten a lot of what happened.

January 26, 2009

Re-Cap: Bunny Sitting

Erica and Nib Recently, Jason and I bunny-sat for one of my co-workers and his wife as they vacationed in a tropical paradise. The rabbit in question’s name is Nib. Nib is a black Mini Rex, which means he’s extra soft as his fur doesn’t have any guard hairs. It also means that when he gets stressed, he molts.

Nib is a very spoiled rabbit. His favorite treats include corn chips and books printed before 1960. Both which aren’t rabbit friendly. But he also like hay, apples, and carrot tops.

For those of you who don’t know, I used to raise rabbits when I was growing up. My first rabbit was an Easter gift when I was 7, and I showed them in 4-H as soon as I was old enough. Going to college was an exercise in not having pets.

Books aside, Nib was a good little rabbit. And also very cute. He liked to run around our condo and snuggle on the couch. Okay, maybe he was actually trying to eat whatever was on our plates.

This was also my time to convince Jason that if we get a pet, we needed to get a rabbit. (Rabbits are the best.) I think Jason really enjoyed having the rabbit around. But I think that he also wants to wait until we have house, specifically a library where we can store all our books and is a no bunnies allowed zone.

Now Nib’s home and I’m sure being extra super spoiled from his parents. Continue reading “Re-Cap: Bunny Sitting”

January 14, 2009

Facebook — To delete or not to delete

I think a lot about deleting my Facebook. I don’t use it for networking; that’s why I have LinkedIn. I don’t use it to contact my close circle of friends. We have face-to-face visits, phones, e-mail, and other methods of communication.

Part of met thinks that I haven’t hammered out how I’m going to use it just yet. Is it networking, keeping track of life lived a long time ago, or connecting with friends? I think this when I get connection requests from co-workers that I don’t like all that much. (Obviously, this does not apply to all, and probably doesn’t apply to you when you think it does.) Or when yesterday, I received and accepted a request from a woman I went to 2nd grade with. And since I don’t know what I’m going to do with it, I don’t really mind those requests. I don’t put overly personal things on it, and since I’m not into partying and one beer at dinner is my limit, I’m not going get caught in some saucy photography.

Mostly I think about getting rid of it due to the voyeur factor. Facebook gives you just enough information to stalk someone, but not enough information to really know them. I suppose that you’re suppose to message people or write on their walls or compare your movie capability. But those still seem like only surface connections.

Sometimes my reactions to Facebook remind me of when my mom was going to attend her 20th high school reunion. Her friend Carol was over and my mom pulled out her old high school yearbook. Carol and myself stood around as my mom started going through her memories and looking at the pictures of the people she used to know. Her high school years, like my own, were not her shining glories. She was an average student and not popular or overly involved.

After we giggled at my mom and my uncle’s ’70s hair, my mom started recounting the people she hung out with. But then it got to the people she hated. The ones that stole her boyfriends or snubbed her friendship. The ones she hoped she looked younger than. The ones she guessed had gotten fat and ugly with age. Or the ones she thought deserved to have landed themselves in jail by now, based on her judgments of them for what they did 20 years ago. She was so bitter. So full of ill wishes and mockery.

Facebook sometimes turns into that for me. I see people I used to know and some of them aren’t people that I like very much. Some of them hurt me and some of them were assholes. Facebook becomes my yearbook, only updated every moment of every day. Unlike my mother, who can leave her yearbook the shelves, I can access Facebook any time of the day, from anywhere. That is why I think about deleting my Facebook account and putting the past on the shelf.

December 12, 2008January 1, 2018

I’m Still as Pretty as a Turtle

Erica as a baby Saturday is my 25th birthday. I’ll be a quarter of a century. Wow. (Yes, this picture is of me when I was a baby.)

My mom is here visiting with my fake!daddy in tow. This time, she let him get his own seat on the plane instead of packing him in her makeup bag. (For I have successfully taught my mom about men-in-jars — the ancient art of shrinking a man down, storing him in a jar, and pulling him out at full-size to use when needed.)

I love birthdays. They are awesome. To celebrate on Saturday, I am having a girls’ day at the spa and treating myself to a massage. (There are many ways that I am treating myself like a lady of luxury.)

While there are unsettled things in my life, I do think that at 25, I am pretty happy. I also think about different my life is than the other women in my family as they turned 25.

My mother was either engaged or almost engaged to my father when she turned 25. She married him shortly after she turned 26 and had me several months after she was 27. This turn in her life made her move to a smaller town, drive in the snow, and become a housewife. (Seriously, my dad took pictures of the hospital grounds the day I was born and there was snow everywhere. See why I live in Seattle now?) At 25, all my mom wanted to do was get married and be a mommy.

My maternal grandma had two small children and another on the way. She lived on a farm in rural South Dakota. She and my grandpa eventually moved to Oregon. It might’ve been when she was 25. But I am not sure of this. (Grandma, any help?) She likes to tell us stories about getting up every morning and butchering 25 chickens to take to market. To think that I don’t even have to grow my own tofu. Can you imagine how everyone would’ve laughed at a vegetarian then? The relatives already think that I’m weird enough.

At almost 25, all I want to do is read comics and hang out with my boyfriend and my totally awesome friends. I mean, we have important debates to consider — like who would win She-Hulk or Wonder Woman? Or maybe I want to ramble all over the interwebs and have conversations with with friends in other cities that I miss so much. Then I’m going to have a spiritual crisis as I drive by a beggar on my way home from my web design job.

I am amazed at just how different my life is. I couldn’t imagine being married or having children. I feel like such a young person myself, and right now, I don’t think I’d trade that feeling for anything.