True Blood 3×02 “Beautifully Broken” TV Review

“Beautifully Broken” continues where we left off; Bill kills some werewolves, Tara almost dies, and Sookie cries on Eric’s manly Viking shoulder. (Okay, maybe the last bit was a stretch. But she does cry, and he feels it because he’s had her blood.)

Eric in True Blood's Beautifully Broken 3x02
Eric ponders his own hotness


Things I liked:

• Conner from Ugly Betty is not dead like I thought last week. Instead, he’s alive, and his name’s Cooter. Which even Bill, the khaki-wearing vampire, makes fun of his name.

• Both the King of Mississippi Russell Edgington and his boyfriend David Talbot are perfectly cast. They fit with the characters I see after reading the books. If you haven’t caught on viewers, they are GAY, gay as blazes.

Russell and Bill in True Blood's Beautifully Broken 3x02
Bill rides on Russells horse His white horse

• Pam and Jessica bonding in the bathroom. “Let’s go look at ourselves in the mirror.” Pam is possibly the only character who thinks Bill’s as stupid as I do. Even if Bill wants Jessica to drink synthetic blood, he should’ve taught her properly. Good thing she has evil auntie Pam. I’d totally watch that spin-off where Pam opens a school to train young vampires. (Pam’s so the Emma Frost of the vampire world. Though with more pastels and less ambition.)

• Lafayette bitching slapping Tara by taking her to visit his mother, her aunt Ruby. Ruby’s of the non-specific crazy variety, and she’s also homophobic and racism. She rejects Lafayette and then waves at him. Oh, the most horrible characters make for the best TV.

Ruby in True Blood's Beautifully Broken 3x02
Ruby waves hi to her dead to her son Crazy bigot

• Jesus, the Hispanic hottie. I believe Lafayette needs a new boyfriend. (I’d suggest him as a rebound fuck for Tara, but she’ll have her hands full with Franklin Mott.)

• Franklin Mott holding the racist redneck guy while Tara punches the hillbilly in the face. (Please note this blog does not condone violence because Captain Picard would frown on it, except in self-defense.) Of course, the violence turned Franklin on.

Franklin and Tara in True Blood's Beautifully Broken 3x02
Tara beats those rednecks and gets Franklin off

• OMG, they’re totally going to go with that Bill plotline. I thought they’d skip over it, considering how much Alan Ball ships Sookie/Bill.

• “Is Santa real?” Oh, Jason, you dimwit. And good on Alan Ball for using some of the best lines from the books. (I’ll give Harris credit where credits due.) I did love Sookie accidentally kicking Jason in the balls, and them cleaning the house together. Your grandma would so be rolling in her grave post-maenad redecorating.

Sookie and Jason in True Blood's Beautifully Broken 3x02
Sookie and Jason scrub like Grandmas going to rise from her grave and yell at them Someone needs to

• Vampire Nazis. Okay, not really. But to see Eric and Godric running around being evil together makes me happy. Also completely gratuitous flashbacks of them hunting Nazi Werewolves.

Eric and Godric in True Blood's Beautifully Broken 3x02
Eric being awkwardly taller than Godric in their SS uniforms Psych Not Nazis

• Jessica spraying the Lysol on the dead body. Also swinging the chainsaw with no plan, only to discover the body’s missing. (There’s really obvious foreshadowing here, friends.)

Jessica in True Blood's Beautifully Broken 3x02
Jessica learns that Lysol cant cure death

• Terry and his list of why he’d be good with Arelene’s kids. Terry and his tiny baby armadillo which he nurtured back to health. *hearts*

“Number one: I’m a nurturer. I found a baby armadillo by the side of the road. I nursed it. And now it sleeps under my bed. Its name is Felix.”

Buddy, be careful what you wish for.

Terry and Arlene in True Blood's Beautifully Broken 3x02
Terry tells his heart Arlene has morning sickness

Things I didn’t like:

• Bill biting werewolves. That’s got to leave some hair in your mouth. Nom. Nom.

Bill in True Blood's Beautifully Broken 3x02
Does that werewolf fur taste good Bill

• Tara the train-wreck. There she goes again. Okay, I cheered when Lafayette told his Aunt Lettie Mae off. That was coming. However, sometimes too little, too late, Lafayette.

• Sookie making Eric “feel.” I don’t need Eric to feel, Sookie. I just need you to take up his offer to have him take off all his clothing. If you don’t want him, you can send him along to my house.

• The vampire politics are so boring here. *yawns* One smart thing Harris does is have vampire politics largely happen off-screen, unless there were deaths or fighting. If Russell wants Sophie-Ann as his mutual beard, we don’t need to see it.

Talbot, Russell, and Bill in True Blood's Beautifully Broken 3x02
The politics may be boring but the gays throw fabulous dinner parties

• I actually liked Bill’s vampire computer software from the books. Bill already wears khakis. All he needs is a polo t-shirt and a retractable badge holder (zinger) to clip to his pants, and he’d be in the Microsoft “uniform.”

• Vampire Nazis. Really, didn’t just anyone hide out elsewhere during World War II. Plus, a total, not even our vampires are evil enough to be Nazis cop-out. (But Russell is.) Plus, I totally saw this scene on Angel:

ANGEL: You’re a Nazi.
SPIKE: What? Oh. No. I just ate one.

or as Angel later puts it:

Angel: Spike’s not in the S.S. He just likes wearing the jacket.

Eric in True Blood's Beautifully Broken 3x02
One more gratuitous Eric as an SS officer because its ridiculous

• Sam’s family, they’re real white-trashy if you didn’t get it. And annoyingly emo Tommy wants to be Sam/kill him in sibling rivalry. I’m pretty bored here. Perhaps it’s just because Sam’s father and my father have the same taste in tighty whities.

Sam's parents in True Blood's Beautifully Broken 3x02
Theyre trashy We got it

• Why can I see Pam and Jessica in the mirror? They’re vampires. Have they hung a lampshade over this yet and I missed it?

Pam and Jessica in True Blood's Beautifully Broken 3x02
Why are they in the mirror

Up in the air:

• I’m not entire sure Bill actually lit Lorena on fire. In the books (and possibly the show last season), it’s stated that Bill cannot move against his Maker. I’m betting this is a fantasy.

Lorena in True Blood's Beautifully Broken 3x02
Lorenas heads on fire Lols

• Franklin Mott. I *know* what a bastard he was in the books. Or more the consequences of what happened after he bore with Tara.

• Jason’s adventures into Hotshot and unofficially meeting Calvin and Crystal Norris. I hope the guy Jason pinned down for drugs isn’t going to be tied to a Calvin-as-dealer plot. He already has a couple big secrets.

This week in Bon Temps, we learned that not even vampires are evil enough to be Nazis, Jessica loses dead bodies, and Andy thinks Jason’s “prettier than most girls.” Oh, True Blood, you have about 50+ too many plots going on and not all of them are that worthy of attention. But you’re also sugar-coated soap opera crack. I just can’t quit you.

Jason and Andy in True Blood's Beautifully Broken 3x02
Just like Jason and Andy cant quit each other

0 Replies to “True Blood 3×02 “Beautifully Broken” TV Review”

  1. Erica – I skipped reading this post because I am not up to speed on True Blood, and didn’t want any spoilers. Nevertheless, I had to comment, because so far on your blog I have found bunnies, vampires, and Dr. Who. That is awesome beyond description. I will be back.

  2. Hi there! I too was perplexed by Pam and Jessica being able to see there refections in the mirror so I did a little digging. In season 1 Bill explains to Sookie (after she notices his reflection n the mirror) that vampires themselves made up most of the myth surrounding them including mirrors, holy water etc. If they were ever questioned about beign human they would pass the test. Hope that helps! Good call on the nazi Angel ep btw. That one was way better!

  3. @Jane — Thanks for the reminder about Bill explaining how the mirrors and holy water were myths.

    I think part of the reason the Angel fights Nazis episode was better was because that was the focus. I was fine with the explanation that Eric had hunted the Nazi werewolves before, but I think him and Godric dressing up as SS officers was just overkill and Ball’s historical fanfic on screen.

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